Understanding Grief and Loss will happen in life.

                                        

There are 6 different types of categories for loss which are Inevitable Loss, The relationship loss, Loss of identity, developments loss, loss of treasured objects & possessions and accumulated loss, Loss is a very large and very complex area to only write a few lines would not give the whole size of it. To feel loss we first need to have some sort of attachment to the person, item, place or the basic security provided by our attachments. Most of these will cross over into each other, and every one deals with grief and loss differently, but understanding that there are the 4 stages and when working as a counsellor I should be working towards the 4 stages of grief when I am with the client. 

The way I would explain it as if I was to drop a stone into a pond, (Stage 1) the first impact reaction would be shock something actual happens, then you would get the (Stage 2) first ripple which does not have the same impact as the initial drop, but still with some protest and anger / force. The (Stage 3) second ripple would happen but not with the same force as the first one and more spaced out, like feeling a little lost and but in the correct direction and the (Stage 4) last ripple would be an even less of a force and would be more to wards reorganisation. How ever there are times when a few stones may be dropped and would make more ripples / complications (accumulated loss) but the movement outward would be the same. There are then obstacles lets say a wall in the pond which can bounce back the small ripples, by this I mean it is possible for clients to move backwards in the stages. You cannot change loss or what has happened after the loss, only work towards understanding it and eventually accepting loss, and putting coping mechanisms in place. 

I understand that it is possible I will feel out of my depth and comfort zone at times when I work with clients facing loss. I would need to identify any challenges I have that I may have and manage them (supervision is my first thought/ private therapy too), so they do not affect the client work in any way. The reasons why we feel this loss is down to the level of attachment we have with the person, place or item. It is important to understand the connection attachment has with grief and loss, an example would be this study of grief and loss by Sigmund Freud, his early paper ‘mourning and Melancholia’ that was published in 1917 was regarded as classic Study bereavement. I understood it to be that he was arguing that the psychological purpose of grief is to withdraw emotional energy from the deceased and then to become detached from them. I also understand that segment Freud Believe that person was to work through his or her loss and grief by reviewing and reflecting thoughts and memories of the deceased, by this process it was believed that bereaved can achieve detachment from the deceased and that the person grieving connections to the deceased will lesson.