This was written back in 2009 for my final external assessment. This was to show my understanding and self awareness, however I was unaware of how important this is self-awareness until I started my Counselling skills Level 3. This will be always ongoing, but will be the best thing you ever give to your self:))
Please feel free to ask me any questions you may have on your training.
Writing External Assessment Unit 3
An extended piece of reflecting
Date: 29th June 2009
Question: What expectations did I bring?
The expectations I came with was, I was going to understand myself more so I could change my feeling or know why I felt certain ways. I wanted to be myself always and just be happy with being me.
What did I experience?
Question: What I understand counselling to be and what I understand is not counselling.
My understanding of the term counselling is it is always at the request of the speaker who is having difficulty or feeling any distress in their life as no one can be properly sent for counselling. The listener provides the speaker with an agreed contract and boundaries. This is always done in a timed, private setting and is confidential, having a beginning, middle and an end. Also Counselling in the UK is working inalinement with the European standards and you will not find a counsellor trying to solve your problems for you but will travel your journey with you. Another way of defining counselling to which I agree is “Counselling is an opportunity for both healing and self-exploration. Counselling offers individuals an opportunity to deal with challenges, losses or changes in their life in a supportive environment. Through talking, reflection, and analysis, counselling helps people to approach their circumstances from a new perspective, receive support to get through difficult times, and improve their quality of life” (Ann-Marie James, 2009) and Counsellors are members of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) to which they have ongoing training, supervision and ongoing accreditation.
Some other helping relations might be similar or can use active listening skills that a
Counsellor will have for example, nurses, emergency services, and phone services like Samaritans or your doctor, but these are not unique as it is with a counsellor. For example your doctor will be situated in a private setting, it may be confidential and sometimes timed. but they will not have a contract with you or any boundaries and they can try and diagnose you, or any problems, they can try and fix your problem, or give you advise, however a counsellor will not try to solve your problems or give you advice or push you in any direction, but will listen and travel your journey with you in the here and now.
Question: Different types of counselling
There are over 400 hundred types of counselling, one is Person Centered Therapy (Carl Rodgers 1902-1987) which is non-directive also known as Rogerian therapy, this approach is based on that each individual has it in themselves the resources they need for growth, and all are capable of achieving their potential, this is helped by applying the core conditions which are necessary for sufficient therapeutic change. The core conditions are unconditional positive regard, Empathy and Congruence. This is different to Gestalt Therapy because the person Centered believes that the speaker is the only one that knows what’s right for them so there is no need for role playing or having to create patterns with objects. But what they have in common is they both focus on in the here and now.
Another type of counselling is Gestalt Therapy (Fritz Perls 1893-1970) it is directive unlike the Person Centered Therapy, Gestalt Therapy is an experiential therapy these experiments can be anything from creating patterns with objects and writing to role playing. It focuses on gaining a self awareness of emotions and behaviors in the here and now rather than in the past. The speaker becomes aware of what they are doing and how doing it and how they can change themselves and learn to accept and value themselves. As a human being is a unified organism. Gestalt is a holistic approach, emphasizing the interaction between self and environment, mind and body, mature and immature feelings, and other aspects of experience which are sometimes seen as separate and different. (Val Potter. P 87) Home work can be given like the Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Dream work is also used in Gestalt therapy again like the Cognitive Behavioural Therapy this is to help the speaker gain some insight into their feelings.
Another is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) (Aaron Beck) focuses on the present and not the past like the Person Centered and Gestalt Therapy. CBT is based on the premise that emotional distress is caused by the way we think, and that changing our way of thinking alleviates worry, anxiety and emotional distress.(cygnet health care, internet site) Cognitive Behavioural Therapy helps the speaker to overcome difficulties’ by changing their thinking ,emotional responses and behavior. This is evidence based with measured outcomes and the speaker usually gets homework like Gestalt and unlike the person centered therapy.
Question: Three skills gained with illustrations of their use.
One of the first skills used to demonstrate active listening is Reflecting, this is when you are repeating the clients words to them in the same order they were used. This is done so the client feels you heard them correctly,
Example; Speaker: I am feeling angry today.
Listener: You are feeling angry today
The second skill used to demonstrate active listening is Paraphrasing; paraphrasing can be know as the comma, this is done when you use some of the listener words and phrases but in your own wording and not in the same order. Making sure you don’t interpret any of words or your feelings. When paraphrasing is used it helps the client feel understood and that you heard what they have said.
Example: Speaker: My husband is expecting me to cook tonight, and I have piles of
Written work to do and my boss is harassing me now.
Listener: You have many demands placed on you.
Another skill used to demonstrate active listening skills is using Open Questions, which encourages the speaker to express their own thoughts and feelings. Open questions help to seek clarification, to establish mutual understanding and can gauge the speaker’s feelings too. This helps to deepen the relationship between the speaker and the listener.
Example: Speaker: My parents have split up and my grades are failing at school, I
do not know what to do.
Listener: Can you tell me how you feel about your parents splitting up?
Where do I want to be in the future?
Question: What changes can I identify (if any) from taking the course?
When I started this course I was having problems in the relationship with my mother, and now it’s much better, I feel that I have learnt a grate deal from this course which has helped me to listen better and being aware of what stops me from listening, I also feel good about being me too, as I have come to learn that people have their own conditions of worth, and I feel its ok to let people see the real me because I listen and act on my own internal locus of evaluation.
Question: What future training has the course experience motivated me to consider?
I feel I have travelled my own journey through the course and became more happy, I found I wanted to learn more and felt the need to change my career to counselling, Every time I think about the change I get excited and push myself harder, this has now lead me to think about the Foundation Degree in Counselling 2009/2010.
Question: How is the course ending for me? My thoughts and feelings.
I feel the course is not really ending for me, but that it is just the beginning of my
journey, I feel I will continue to develop myself and my relationship with others, I
think and feel that I am a more confident person. I am happy and grateful to the group I worked with over the last 10 weeks, and have made many real friends to which I will
keep in contact with. I started the course unhappy, lacking confidence and unsure of myself, but at the end of the course I became happy, gained more confidence and know who I am with the future path I want to take.
Word count 1330
References
Cygnet health care (1988) Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Available at http://www.cygnethealth.co.uk (accessed on 28th June 2009)
Ann-Marie James, (2007) The Life Story Therapeutic. Available at http://www.reading-coundellor.co.uk (accessed on 20th June 2009)
Val Potter. (1997) Is counselling training for you, Sheldon press.
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